Katie

Wow! Katie has so much talent. She re-did my blog page and it looks great. Other than, whats up with all the pictures of my children making a face? ha ha. No Wynstun, Unja or ZaZu either? Maybe her work is not yet done. Katie is a very talented young lady. She has made good choices in life where they count the most - in the eternity aspect of things. She makes me laugh, a lot. She makes me stress, a lot. She can evoke a whole series of emotions in a short amount of time. You can go from wanting to hug her to wanting to choke her in just one conversation. I love her with all my heart. She was like my anchor child when times got tough and a divorce was imminent. She gets frustrated at me because I worry so much about her but its only because I would die if anything bad happened to her. Just the thought makes my heart ache and brings on stress that I would rather not deal with. She has so much creative talent that it puts a lot of us to shame. She's going to be a nanny now, as she starts this new chapter in her life. She will do a great job because she has an inborn love of small children and they seem to gravitate towards her. She can use her talents and creativity with this job. Cooking, hair, nails, crafts, songs, games, etc. Her brain sometimes amazes me. She can figure out almost anything on a computer. She thinks I'm brain dead when it comes to computers but thats just because I'm so far behind her that it seems that way to her. Don't get me wrong, I work on a computer all day at work and do just fine. It's expanding out of the programs I work in that I have a challenge with. Most of the time, she tries to be patient with me when I ask her questions. But a lot of the times, she just laughs at me. That's okay. I can see why she would and it's only out of fun. I know that deep down she loves me too!

Difficult Day

It's been a difficult day for me today in more ways than one. The biggest and most emotional thing was finding out that my parents couldn't come and see me after all because yet again, they had to host family members of my older siblings. One of which has already spent a good amount of time there already. It's a sibling jealousy thing, I know that, I should have outgrown it by now, but it's still real to me and it's still emotionally hard. I was in tears by the time I got off the phone with my mom trying really hard for her not to notice. It's not really her fault, she's told me more than once that sometimes it seems her life is not her own. I can understand that now.

I also had to deal with my difficult co-worker and her ranting and raving over the schedule - yet again - because she might miss out on some of her precious lunch time. Forget the fact that it's a provider who asked me to make the schedule and forget the fact that this same co-worker generally only works 2-days per week but in the last 3-months, has barely worked 30-hours due to one personal thing after another. She left co-workers to work alone twice by not showing up for work. So when she's finally there, after almost 3-weeks, and the provider today left at 10:00am and didn't get back until 3:00pm, she really had no excuse to be saying anything. Yet she did, as usual and it irritated me, as usual!

Then I got the results back from the lab tests I had done and find out that I'm positive again for C-Diff which is a difficult gut bug to get rid of and yet if you don't get rid of it, it could eventually kill you and in the meantime, you live with the horrible symptoms I've had once again since the last time I had to treat it. This time my GI doc gave me the heavy duty stuff to fight it, at a cost of $155.00 my cost for the 2-weeks I need to be on it. Can you say, ouch!?

So, there you have it. A day I'll be happy to forget.

Disappointment

As I was sitting in church today I was thinking about how disappointed I've become in the actions of my brothers & sisters in the gospel. Let me expound . . .

Since working part-time at Robert's craft store, I've seen greediness abound in individuals who should be setting a better example. They come in and don't want to follow the simple rules that go along with the coupons. They want everything for nothing. If a sign says, "Free bubbles", they pull up in their cars and take case loads with no thought or care to anybody else that may want some. Sometimes after these people leave and my co-workers turn to me and comment about how "they probably went to the temple last night", I am embarrassed for their behavior that is so obviously un-christian-like.

At my full-time job, I deal with lots and lots of different people. You couldn't imagine my surprise when one of those people showed up in our wards sacrament meeting today for the blessing of her grandchild. She was obviously a member. I knew this because she knew the hymns very well. She had "garment" lines and she partook of the sacrament. The sad part is, I would have never known based on the way she acts at work. Not that I've seen her do anything particularly wrong, just the snippy way she has always been when coming into the clinic or when I'm dealing with her in regards to the department she over-sees.

Shouldn't we be a kinder, more tolerant, honest people? I always thought so and that, my dear friends and family, is why I'm feeling disappointed today.

Now, before I end this blog I must tell you that I know that I haven't always been the best example of our religion either, and for that, I feel bad. I'm going to work harder at remembering who I am "at all time, in all things, and in all places".